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free time in my future? and teaching fantasies

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BBag2

Originally uploaded by realrellim

Here you see R’s completed Buddy Bag. I’m really happy about how it turned out, and more so because she doesn’t want a fabric lining in it, yay! She does, however, still want the remaining three finger puppets. I was hoping she might have forgotten because she’s been obsessed with what she wants me to make her out of the new amigurumi books I bought–to the point that for two mornings running, one of the books was in bed with me when i woke up because she brought it into look at and then stashed it next to my head. But no, she’s truly my child, which means she forgets nothing. I’m dutifully working on the bird finger puppet.

April and the first few days of May have been crazy busy, so I’m hoping everything will subside now. I’ve given one final and calculated semester grades; the other semester is coming to an end next week. I’ve also written two conference paper proposals and attended a hearing for a student judicial issue, all in the last week (!). It was sheer bliss when I didn’t have to go teach this afternoon.

So, we went to the zoo. It was great. Except for the part when a news crew approached us because they were doing a story on polar bears. No kidding. One of the older bears (22 years old) had died over the weekend and they wondered how I felt about that. Um. I’m thinking, “so, is 22 young or old for a polar bear?” and “what short straw did you pick to get assigned this news story?” She asks, “did you come looking for three polar bears today?” I told her yes, but when I only saw two, I figured I was confusing the zoo with the Daniel Pinkerton books we’ve been reading (Hotel Larry, Bad Bears in the City, etc) because there are three polar bears in that zoo. Yes, I really said that. Yep, way to sound like a moron.

On the other hand, at least I didn’t show up on the news as “polar bear fan.”

Onto teaching fantasies…

It’s the end of the semester. Students who have been engaged in other recreational pursuits now realize that grades are due and some of them, unfortunately, slam into reality much as one might a brick wall. Here are some of my favorite requests and the responses I’d love to give (but don’t):

- from a student who has not completed several assignments and whose grade reflects it: “Can we meet to talk about my grade?”

My fantasy response: “No. You didn’t do the work. There’s nothing to discuss. Stop wasting your time and mine.”

- from a student who didn’t turn in an assignment and didn’t read my comment that said “not submitted,” who wondered if I had mixed his up with someone else’s: “I don’t agree with the low grade you gave me.”

My fantasy response: “No one asked you to agree with the grade. It’s a grade, not a sales transaction. I think receiving any points for work you have not done is generous on my part and you would be foolish to complain about it.” (The points he received were in error. I had forgotten to go in and 0 them out after filling out the grading form.)

-from A students who can’t see the forest for the trees: “Could you please check _____? I think I did better (or the variant, “I don’t want to be penalized for …”)

My fantasy response: “If you already have an A, do not waste my time over five points or how you think you really got 100% on the final or I will lower your grade so you have something real to complain about.”

One other unfortunate student made a foolish complaint, but in his case, the complaint was so foolish that I minced no words. The problem? He wasn’t prepared to complete an assignment, left a note for the grader asking whether he could have a little extra time to do the last few questions. He was granted that time, and then didn’t bother to read the response, complete the assignment, and was, two days later, complaining that he didn’t think it was fair that we hadn’t even bothered to give him a grade. He had a number of other basic facts (among them, the purpose of the university library) incorrect as well.

I showed him the error of his ways. His attitude has since improved considerably.

I do not suffer fools gladly. At least not at the end of the semester.

That said, there was a wonderful moment on Saturday when one of my students turned in his final and thanked me for the class. He said he’d also taken the other half of this class (a world music survey split into two semesters) when I’d taught it a few years back (!) and that it was great to have a good ethnomusicologist in the department. !! I had warm fuzzies the rest of the day.



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